December 2009
9 posts
What a Bad Day
I feel like shit so I’m going to describe this pain in case anybody feels like identifying with this. First of all my body wants to make a poopy, but since there really isn’t food in my stomach, there is no poop, and therefore I don’t understand why my body wants to go. Poop is a funny word. People should use it more. Everyone has to be cool and say shit or dump or something but...
7 tags
2009 in an angry memory
This is where I sum up the year, and not Christmas like I did instead last time. Now It’s not the end of the year yet, but what am I going to wait until New Years Day to post this. I don’t think so. It would be old news by then and nobody would care. So here are the top ten things about this last year. I should mention that for some reason I feel the need to use angry text so...
Something a random person told me who looked...
My back hurts and I want you to know that. Remember this pain and remember it good. Sure maybe it’s not a sharp stabbing pain, and just more of a dull sort of discomfort, but it’s worse than your perfect back. Sure you can say just because I have better posture than you doesn’t mean you should be mad at me. While I am, because my posture could kick your postures ass, even if it...
8 tags
Christmas: The Top Ten List
Apparently people with blogs sum up the end of the year at the end of the year. Well Fuck that, it’s not the end of the year yet so I’m gonna sum up Christmas instead. And If this offends you b/c I’m not including your holiday celebrations, believe me, when I’m done with Christmas, you’ll be happy I didn’t talk about Hanukkah (except I kinda do). so here’s...
5 tags
Stay at Home Dad or Bang Maid
If guys could give birth how worthless would women be, am I right? I kid cuz obviously I’d still want a bang maid, but I mean c’mon. I wonder how different society would be if men did give birth. First of all women would be the main workhorses, not that women don’t work anymore but I assume those roles would have been reversed. But then obviously it would have been the same life...
3 tags
Procrastin
why does procrastination always win the battle with any sort of to do list. I mean how can I ALWAYS choose to not do something productive. And the other choices are worthless, like this right here, I mean I may as well just finger my asshole to get some sort of positive out this situation. I just spent like a half an hour translating a logic puzzle for children to contain a situation involving...
6 tags
We Ninjas Son
I’m gonna buy a gun, because I’m an American. But seriously having a gun would be badass. I could store it in front of my crotch and lift up my shirt to threaten people. Not to mention I could rob people with it, or just shoot at people who are either robbing me, or ignoring my vacation stories I try to tell them. I mean it’s for their benefit, not everybody knows Florida had...
2 tags
The Coma Paradox
How much time are you supposed to wait to date again if say your wife is in a coma. Or husband too, is a year enough. I think so, in fact, less then a year should suffice. Probably around three months or something. Depending on the prognosis of course. I mean if it’s unlikely they’ll recover I shouldn’t be tied down to vegetable. I mean could I have sex with this coma patient. I...
4 tags
Through the Eyes of the Socially Inadequate
It’s tough being a socially awkward individual. You have a lot of social challenges, like meeting new people. I mean I haven’t met and befriended anyone new in like a full year. Maybe it’s not the fact that I’m awkward, but just because I have no drive to meet new people. I mean my first year at Iowa State I met a fair share of people, of course I didn’t know anybody...